[He waves a hand, a gesture of "not quite". This is usually the bit that's confusing, the bit where he needs to explain he's not actually that Loki. Which is a lie, mostly, but one he needs to tell.]

Technically speaking, it wasn't me at all, but the Loki before me. Odin decided he needed teaching a lesson, and cursed him to become a tree until such a time as someone shed so much as a single tear for him. I don't think any Loki would like being trapped in one place at all, least of all with such an uncertain condition of ending the spell.

[It was dull. Very, very dull. And the condition his father set on it wasn't fair; he knew no-one would cry for Loki.]

But no Loki ever appreciated being trapped in one place for long, so I understand it was probably quite boring. You know how it is, I'm sure.

[Because he can recognise a spinner of lies and trouble when he sees one.]