Welcome to hell welcome to hell welcome to hell

[neverheardofhim]

 

 

Guess what, Savrou?It's highly likely that things are going to explode worse than they already have. I've decided to bring Varric Tethras into the game.Varric isn't a bad guy, but he and Hawke tend to get into loads of trouble together. Once upon a time they went on an adventure, and in that adventure they basically turned a madwoman Templar into a super madwoman. Good times? Great times. 

Varric is taken from shortly after the end of Inquisition (probably after a really drunken celebration). He tends not to care much about wordly conflicts unless his bestie is involved (in which case, he'll take her side). Varric also has what some might call an unhealthy obsession with his crossbow, Bianca. It's definitely taken a turn for the weird, as she's literally fused to his back at the moment. Fun shit. 

As for me, my name is Asher. I'm a recent college grad dude with way too much time on his hands. If you want to chat at me, let me know! I can be reached here if you're interested in plurk, at Ashstriferous#9890 on Discord, or via private messaging. 

I look forward to getting to know all of you.

Comments

[purramedic]

[harderfasterwrecker]

#SCREAM

SO MUCH DA. I AM SO PLEASED.

HI ASHER! I AM SHELLY AND I PLAY A GIANT ANGRY HELICOPTER NAMED WHIRL FROM THE TRANSFORMERS COMICS.

[neverheardofhim]

HUFF. I posted a response to you yesterday but my phone must have messed up or something! Hello Shelly! i'm Asher and I'm delighted to meet you!!!

[gentlemenpreferblondes]

Hello Asher and welcome! I'm Jenni and I play this mess of a lady called J. :>

I'm 100% canonblind to DA but I've heard so much about Varric that I'm excited to see him around the game hahah. I can't wait to see what adventures he'll come up with Hawke this time.

[neverheardofhim]

It's awesome to meet you!

Basically the only thing you need to know is what I put up there, that shit is undoubtedly going to get wrecked now that Varric and Hawke are reunited.

I hope we get a chance to chat in-character! I'd love to get to know your character more! She seems pretty radical!

[arcreact]

YES GOOD

I'm completely DA blind but have heard Many A Thing about Varric as well, so I'm excited to see him here!! I'm Mel and I just play this asshole here, who happens to have bestie CR with Hawke, which means these two totally need to hang out.

[neverheardofhim]

Hello Mel! I'm not going to lie, I've been looking forward to shit talking sessions between Tony and Varric. And also possibly a custody battle? I dunno, we'll see what happens.

[arcreact]

yes good I LIVE FOR SHITTALKING

also why custody battle when they can just combine their forces to create a singularity of bad decisions and gang up on everyone else

[neverheardofhim]

Not gonna lie, I much prefer this option. You have a deal, friend.

[otiosity]

BODY SLAMS YOU

[neverheardofhim]

COME ON AND SLAM

this is going to be an absolute disaster

[swarm_embrace]

Talk about being attached to your weapon.

Anyway hi I'm Cap it's nice to meet you!

[neverheardofhim]

Hello Cap, it's nice to meet you!

Honestly this isn't the first time Bianca's done something unspeakable to his backside. He really should be used to it.

[swarm_embrace]

As long as he keeps the intimate details to himself.

[fluidsea]

Oh, hey. you're the same Varric player that's on my plurk. Good to see you you got him in.

Anyway, I'm Kyle and I play this new character in the game: Madison Rocca aka Maddie aka that blue spandex-wearing magic girl from Power Rangers Mystic Force. I look forward to having CR with you.

[neverheardofhim]

Hi Kyle!! It's awesome to share two games with you (i'm also Dorian on VR)! I look forward to interacting with you!

[tearsinajar]

Yay, you're in! I can't wait to do more Bull and Varric things! I'm cass and it's nice to meet you and have you with us!

[neverheardofhim]

It's wonderful to meet you as well! I'm pretty jazzed to be there.

Super sorry I kinda let our thread drop. Last week was pretty busy and all that jazz. I was absolutely enjoying the thread and would love to continue it. If you're interested, we can bump it over to an inbox/journal or something like that?

If not, totally cool. I'm looking forward to what other shenanigans these two get up to

[tearsinajar]

Nah man! December is a busy time for everyone, myself included. It's coolbeans. I'm down for bumping it over to an inbox :D

[efficacy]

Varric is one of my favorite Dragon Ages, most excellent! Hi, I'm Ebs and I'm also a newbie, looking forward to seeing Varric in the game. C:

[neverheardofhim]

Ah, hello there! I hope I can do your fave justice. I haven't watched the MCU movies in long while, but I've always enjoyed Pepper! I hope we get the chance to chat ic at some point!

[squadgoals]

Here's what I know about Varric:
- Hairy (needs citation)
- Likes drinks
- Baudy (or maybe just short???)
- Likes trouble
- Has a necklace

I'm so sorry I never played DA

Also, welcome Asher!! My name is Xan, and I'm on Plurk over at nijikai, and you're gonna have a blast here. :D

[neverheardofhim]

I'm... fairly canonblind to ME as well (most of my friends have let me in on the gritty details but beyond that???).

That said, you basically described Varric to a T. He's my garbage man in a garbage can!

Anyway, sent you an add request! Hopefully these two can chat at some point!

[sketchycharacter]

WAVES HIS BOOK AROUND, POINTS TO ALL THE NOTATIONS NATE MADE

also let's have a chest hair-off

[neverheardofhim]

Marian can be the judge.

(also how dare u mark up his beautiful work like that, nate)

[sketchycharacter]

To be clear, Varric will definitely win, but Nate is good enough to compete.

Look it was necessary!

[neverheardofhim]

I really want these two to be bros. Send help.

[Hawke taunting/protecting b r o s]

[sketchycharacter]

I want this so much

[liberaltus]

Dorian will not be amused by the fact that Bianca has fused with Varric. Isn't that taking the obsession to the next level? You've now reached pathological.

[neverheardofhim]

It certainly gives "attached at the hip" new meaning.

Also hello, I love your Dorian.

[liberaltus]

It's one thing that Dorian doesn't have to complain about at least.

Well thank you, I need to get his ass in gear, but the holidays, finals and family are all sucking out my soul. I've been abysmally slow.

[neverheardofhim]

I know that feeling. I just wrapped up an internship yesterday (sort of, still doing slow, remote work). Up until that it was a mad dash to the finish. Yowza.

Hopefully things slow down for you soon! Or at least get a little less soul suck-y

[a_shadow]

Hi and welcome to the game! I'm Marti and I play Tex here from Red vs. Blue. Sorry for the lateness on the welcome but I just wanted to let you know we have a discord server set up for game chat, which you can access here: https://discord.gg/AtxxPkB. Hope to see you in there!